Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Lend me your ears...

...because The Fox said so.

No, not really.

While we do have "super"star singers, we also have those Super "super"star singers who are able to break into the international market with one song which for some reason, everyone latches onto and follow.

Lets look at the hit sensation of 2012. I'm talking about Gangnam Style by Psy. It is the first video to hit more than 1 billion views on Youtube. Remarkable feat no less, but I suspect most of that came from lonely trolls sitting at home and hitting refresh on all their devices at once. Well, how did it become so popular?
Firstly because it was a foreign language song. I'm being serious. The fact that most westerners cannot understand a single word being said makes it all the more special. On top of that, the song being Korean makes it even more enjoyable because honestly, when haven't you heard a western person be slightly racist and make fun of the Asian languages? I'm not saying every western person does it, that's being too general, but ask the average western person what Asian languages sound like and you're more than likely to get the same response from them all.

I'll get to the dance later, but first, I want to stick to the language side for now. When it comes to foreign language songs, everyone has this obsession to mimic the noises and sounds they hear, as if they really speak the language. People then start singing in front of their friends, coupled with the dance, laugh at how stupid they sound (which is quite frankly extremely rude to laugh, because in a sense, you're mocking the language and laughing at the mockery) and then this gets passed on through social media and word of mouth.

Here's a video showing what I mean. The second half is the same person and having dramatically improved the language.

Next, a breakdown of the Gangnam Style dance. Well, it's quite easy to analyse why people love it. It's simple and easy to learn. There are a total of 4 different moves. Out of the 4, two of those almost anyone can do (and will know), the third one is a little bit trickier and the last one nobody remembers. Because of its pure simplicity, people are able to join in and have fun dancing to a mildly catchy beat. Not I. I don't like dancing. Especially when there are millions of other people making a fool of themselves already, I don't need to add to that pool.

With the history lesson out the way, let's look at slightly more recent phenomenon: What does the fox say by Ylvis. I have no idea how to pronounce that, but since it's a foreign word, I'll let Google Translate do it for me:

Why is this song so popular? Because it's simply absurd and stupid. It's Old MacDonald Had A Farm for adults, but on some form of hallucinatory drug. I mean sure, it's a legitimate question, but not in a song, and especially not when the answers they give are just pure excrement.

If you want answers, you turn to science. Cue the video:
That is the red fox, which is probably the one Ylvis was undoubtedly singing about since he dressed up like one. Okay, now you know the answer, let's get back to the topic at hand.

The song was popular for its absurdity. We know that the fox probably doesn't make those sounds, but since most of us probably have never heard or seen a fox make any sounds, all of the sounds that Ylvis claims they make, then become legitimate answers.

Next, the dance. It's terrible. Enough said.

So if you're not a "super"star singer like Katy Perry or Michael Buble, and you're thinking about wanting to make it famous worldwide, either sing in a foreign language with a really catchy beat or sing about a question, then come up with ridiculous answers. If you don't know a foreign language, well learn one or make up your own. LOTR and Star Trek had theirs, you can too.

Oh, don't forget the dance. You need a weird, but simple dance.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Speak talking.

I've been listening to a lot of rap music these days. No, not because I like rap music. I listened to rap music because I wanted to test out a theory, and let me tell you, was it tedious to sit through. A four-minute rap song felt like 20 years. Maybe not that ridiculous, but it was begrudgingly difficult to sit through for so long.

What theory you ask? The theory that every rap song contains the name of the artists who are singing it. I'm not talking about amateur rap songs or comedic rap songs such as the Epic Rap Battles of History, but I'm focusing on the professional rap songs, by professional artists.

Have you ever noticed the trend? Maybe because it's due to my lack of knowledge, that I had to Google rap songs and then proceed to find them on Youtube one after the other, or that I had to ask other people for suggestions, but out of all the rap songs I have listened to so far, my theory stands.

Maybe you should give it a go yourself. Post any rap songs you find which breaks this "tradition" and I will be "happy" to listen to it and see if it is true.

Monday, March 25, 2013

An explanation required.

I'm bored. Really bored. What do you normally do when you're bored? You might play a game online, or surf aimlessly on Youtube, perhaps read articles on Wikipedia if that's your thing. Well, I didn't feel like doing anything in that list and opted instead, to browse pictures of my friends on Facebook. I know right? Crazy idea you say.

As I rummaged through the thousands of photos posted, I came across a...trend (if you will) of photos which, to me, are certainly peculiar and most certainly incomprehensible as to why people will do such a thing. Allow me to continue the list:

1. People who take photos of themselves and their friends via the medium of a mirror.
Why? Just...why? The glare makes the photo hard to see, let alone there being an ugly looking piece of thing being held up to take the photo emitting some form of blinding light. It looks disgusting and I don't understand why people do so. I don't want to be looking at your messy room. At least clean the area behind you so that there aren't any under garments spread across the bed or in some rare cases, sex toys strewn across the shelf. This needs to die. Seriously. Either learn to take a picture without a mirror, get someone else to do it for you, or not take one at all. They are sickening to look at.

2. People who flip the bird in pictures.
These offenders are idiots in my opinion. A perfectly decent photo ruined by stupidity. Was it really called for to flip the bird at the camera? What message is trying to be conveyed, that "I'm having a really good time, can you just please F*** off?" It can't be too difficult to get a picture taken of yourself without the temptation or need to stick the middle finger out in full frontal view. I've accomplished that task many times. Maybe it's because I'm a teacher and I'm more aware of my public image, but just because one is not a teacher, does not impede on the natural human decency to resist urges to flip the bird at the camera. What is worse are people who flip the bird AND simultaneously drink alcohol at the same time. Now I know why I avoid parties when certain people are invited.

3. People who stick their tongue out in photos.
Only acceptable when you're with a large group of people and everyone is making some "funny" face. Rarely do I come across a photo where someone actually does pull a funny face. Most of the time, it's not funny. If you're not involved in the above circumstance, then there is no need for me to look at the bacteria ridden surface inside your mouth. Just, put your tongue away inside your mouth and smile like a more mature, civilized person. Except if you're Gene Simmons. He's allowed.

4. People who try too hard to look good.
This group only includes a handful of people. These are the male population with abs and muscles who feel the obsessive compulsive need to upload photos of themselves without a shirt on. We get the point, now get lost with those photos. Maybe I'm just jealous because I don't have abs and instead, have a big, fat belly, but I'm sure there are girls out there who prefer a buy with a big belly and not abs. You don't see me posting photos of me topless do you? For the female population, it's those who must show off their beautiful body as some object of desire. What disappoints me more is when the male population post comments about the sexiness of the body and how they want to "tap that", whatever that means. I'm sure they're just thirsty. Maybe these girls are lacking confidence in themselves that they must seek out positive comments to promote their ego and self-esteem? Perhaps.

I want an explanation to these peculiar behaviours. It confuses me as to why people continue to post such pictures of themselves. Unlike me, they don't really have a public image to uphold, but like me, they probably don't want any of these photos to be used as evidence against them in the future.

I seem to have forgotten several groups of people which has been made aware to me.

5. People who do the "duck face".
A good friend of mine said he doesn't understand why people pull this ugly face. Women are worse offenders than men. Especially the younger population. I think SOME are okay. Please note the emphasis on the word 'some'. I'm going to leave this update at an end here.

6. People who make the "telephone call me sign" with their hand or hands.
I don't know what era or time period you're living in, but those phones have been out of fashion for years now. Who even uses a home phone these days? Well I do as well, but my point is, mobile phone usage has increased a lot more. It does a LOT more than a home phone does. The politically correct sign to make is this:

That says: "Call me on my iPhone". Or smartphone if you don't like Apple products.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Delays and Hiatus

It really has been an extremely long time since I posted anything here. Well, the reason is the exact same reason why I haven't proceeded to make any Youtube videos for quite some time now.

I started making Youtube videos because I thought it would be fun. It was an interesting experience while it lasted and I enjoyed all the positive and negative comments. I loved the negative ones the best because they offered me an opportunity to reflect on myself and my thoughts. I stopped because it was no longer enjoyable. I guess you could say I was never really interested in making videos. Perhaps you're right. It very quickly became a chore, a bit like a part time job, rather than something I enjoyed doing out of pure enthusiasm. I lost the interest. To be perfectly honest, I love making the videos. I still tend to record myself ranting now and then, just so I am able to document my thoughts and review them later on if I ever need to. I just don't spend any time editing the videos. That takes much too long and it really isn't fun.

I put aside this blog because I had a lot of other things to worry about in my life. This blog quickly became a chore since I had to constantly think about what I had to write. I was better off putting my brain power elsewhere.

This blog post really doesn't serve any purpose other than the fact that I wish to bring this blog back to life again. I've managed to sort myself out better and I think I'm ready to dedicate a bit of time to posting more often here.

Not that anyone reads it.